Thank you for shopping! The Bay to Breakers Liquor Store Map 2013 rears its fully-updated head, beaconing you to the nearest liquor store when you are running drunk and discombobulated deep in the remotest moats of Golden Gate Park. This year’s Bay to Breakers Liquor Store Map is a publicly available Google Map, so no need to download anything new to view it on your smartphone when your booze and smokes run low out Stow Lake way (perhaps bookmark it on your phone in advance?). We reiterate that backpacks are banned from Bay to Breakers this year, as are all Personal Booze Transportation devices larger than 8.5″x11″x4″.

Your Bay to Breakers Liquor Store Map changes this year are minimal. The new Divisadero Bi-Rite has moved in as your first liquor store after Hayes Hill. They don’t sell cigarettes anymore, but they have a full selection of beer, wine and liquor. The last mile of the race course has changed, bringing you within 500 yards of Clancey’s Market at your final turn between MLK and the bike path. You should resist this tempation — the Finish Line, 7-11 and Western Sunset Market are less than half a mile away.

Click on the map above (or here) to go into Google Map interactive mode, with directions and commentary at each marked red dot. If I fucked anything up, give a shout in the comments and I will fix it before Bay to Breakers 2013 on Sunday. Your liquor stores, in their order of appearance, are listed below:

• City Beer Wine & Tobacco (Howard & 4th St.) – Your first liquor store on the race course! They opened up special today at 6 a.m.
• Yerba Buena Market (Howard & 6th St.) – But seriously, if you’re already buying more booze, I would recommend next year starting with larger volumes.
• Harvest Urban Market (Howard & 8th St.) -This store has glass doors and a delicate all-glass exterior, and the glass doors politely ask “Please Use Natoma Street Entrance”. Oh, do they have another thing coming.
• Go Go Market (9th St. & Mission) Only the fourth liquor store open on a Sunday morning, and we’re already nearing the two-mile mark. Shocking, huh? They’ve been open since 6.
• Nabila’s (Hayes & Laguna) – This is your last one before heading up Hayes Hill.
• Hayes Market (Hayes & Buchanan) – They finally took the apostrophe off the word Hayes! They realize it’s a name and not a possessive singular!
• H&W Market (Hayes & Webster) – Now there’s a liquor on every block and it’s like an embarrassment of riches.
• Tim’s (Hayes & Fillmore) – This corner used to have two liquor stores, but In & Out Market has closed. Sad emoticon.
• Bi-Rite Divisadero (Divisadero & Hayes) – Look out for those goddamned ice cream people!
• New Star-El Liquor (Divisadero & Fell) - Last liquor store directly along the race course route! That is just astonishing to me. There are still more than four and a half miles left!
• Faletti Foods (Fell & Broderick) – You have to go off-course, but not far.
• AA Market (Broderick & Fulton) – “AA Market, funny enough” – Andrew Dalton, SFist
• Parkside Market (Hayes & Lyon)
• Nimer’s (Fulton & Lyon) - Four blocks off-course, but Nimer is a great guy.
• Home Service Market (Hayes & Central)
• Lucky (Fulton & Masonic) – Last best chance before Golden Gate Park!!! Large volumes, awesome discounts.
• Fulton Food Shop (Fulton & Masonic) – I would advise going to Lucky across the street. It will be cheaper.
• Central Park Liquors (Hayes & Ashbury) – The former Deli Plus has received a beautiful facelift.
• Cindy’s Market (Hayes & Cole)
• Parkview Market (Stanyan & Frederick) – Now you’re in Golden Gate Park, and you’re heading way out of your way. Can you make it to 8th Ave.? It’s a much shorter time investment.
• Arguello Market (Arguello & 2nd Ave.)
• Drink Liquor (Balboa & 2nd Ave.) – Yes, there is actually a liquor store called Drink Liquor! Unfortunately, it is one of the furthest off-course liquor stores on this whole map.
• Golden Bear Market (Judah & 6th Ave.)
• Safeway (Cabrillo & 7th Ave.) – Turn right at the DeYoung Museum and this is one of your easiest liquor pick-ups in Golden Gate Park!
• Stand-Bi Market (Judah & 8th Ave.)
• Denhard’s Market (Cabrillo & 10th Ave.) – They even have a Xerox machine, if you need one.
• 828 Irving Market (Irving & 9th Ave.) – You really should head north to Safeway on Cabrillo, but if you feel the need to be making forward progress there will now be a string of liquor stores in the Sunset.
• Royal Food Store (Judah & 9th Ave.) – Ditto above.
• Judah 9th Ave. Liquors (Judah & 9th Ave.) – Ditto above.
• Sun Valley Market (Irving & 10th Ave.) - Ditto above.
• Park Farmer’s Market (Irving & 11th Ave.) - Ditto above.
• Andronico’s (Irving & Funston) – There are some serious bull in a china shop possibilities here for you all hammered-ass drunks in this high-end gourmet grocery store. They have beer and wine.
• Europa Express (Irving & 11th Ave.) – An all-Russian liquor store for the fluent Russian speakers among you! They have Russian vodkas like Beluga, Rublevka, and other things I can’t pronounce because their labels are in Cyrillic.
• 17th Balboa Market (Balboa & 17th Ave.) - At Stow Lake, cut North and this place is easy to find — just look at the name.
• Handy’s (Irving & 19th Ave.) – Last chance for liquor until 24th Avenue! And do you know for sure you’re even going to make it that far?
• Easy Money Discount Cigarettes (Irving & 24th Ave.) – Great name, but pretty far off-course.
• Sunset Super (Irving & 24th Ave.) – If you somehow miss the turn-off at 19th and manage to make it through all the heavy brush and chain link fences, there’s another beer-only option a little further down the Sunset. They have regular domestic beer — but every single grocery there otherwise is full-on Chinese. It’s all Pocky and sea animal-flavored fried chip snacks. On the plus side, you can score rice wine and Chinese liquor.
• Balboa Bi-Rite Market (Balboa & 26th Ave.) – Just walk North on Crossover Drive! Five blocks North of the race course you’ll find the shittiest Bi-Rite in town.
• Judah Mini Market (Judah & 28th Ave.)
  
• Sunset Strip Liquors  (Judah & 31st Ave.)
• Better Food Market (Balboa & 33rd Ave.) – When the race course intersects with 30th Avenue, head North and then cross to Balboa at 32nd. Very easy!
• Balboa Liquor & Deli (Balboa & 36th Ave.) - If you don’t recognize Spreckels Lake, then just look for a lake with First Aid tents. Go off course and walk the perimeter of the lake over to 36th Avenue, you are totally able to see Fulton Street from where you are. From Fulton and 36th at the edge of the park, walk North up 36th Ave. for two blocks and you’ll see Balboa Liquor & Deli one block to the West.
• Balboa Produce Market (Balboa & 37th Ave.) - If you don’t recognize Spreckels Lake, then just look for a lake with First Aid tents. Go off course and walk the perimeter of the lake over to 37th Avenue, you are totally able to see Fulton Street from where you are. From Fulton and 37th at the edge of the park, walk North up 36th Ave. for two blocks and you’ll see Balboa Produce Market.
• Judah & 39th Ave. Market (Judah & 39th Ave.)
• Clancy’s Market (Irving & 24th Ave.) – Formerly Charlie’s Market! When the course veers hard to the right past the buffalo (bison?), you have this 20-minute round trip option. When the course turns right, you turn left and take MLK South to Lincoln. MLK puts you out right at 41st & Lincoln, and Charlie’s is one block down 41st at Irving.
• Richmond Market (Balboa & 41st Ave.) – At this point you should really just finish the race, people. But this is here.
• Western Sunset Market (Judah & 46th Ave.) – This is the closest Finish Line-area liquor store with liquor!
• 7-11 (Judah & 46th Ave.) – This one does not have liquor. It is a 7-11. It has beer, wine and cigarettes.
• Your Market, My Deli (48th Ave. & Kirkham) – You can avoid the long lines by walking a little further South.
• Joe’s Market (Cabrillo & 10th Ave.) – I would buy booze here, but I wouldn’t buy food here.
• Safeway (LaPlaya & Fulton) - Right on the other side of the windmill! But you should just finish the race and then come here. You have, like, four more blocks!
• Fredy’s Ocean Beach Deli (LaPlaya & Cabrillo) – I’m not sure if this place is still even open.
• Europa Express (LaPlaya & Balboa) - An all-Russian liquor store for the fluent Russian speakers among you! They have Russian vodkas like Beluga, Rublevka, and other things I can’t pronounce because their labels are in Cyrillic.
• Beach Chalet (Great Highway at Finish Line) – A great place to regroup once you’ve finished the race is the Beach Chalet and it’s notorious after-party. They’ll have no cover, Bay to Breakers drink specials, and live music. Let your people come together and devise further party plans after you’ve all finished the race.